We’re not selling this deal anymore, but you can buy it at Amazon

LG 1000W RMS Hi-Fi Entertainment & Karaoke System

  • It is 1000 watts of pure party power.
  • Generally, we don’t support the silencing of artists. Except here, where you can use Karaoke Creator to suppress the vocal frequencies of a song (and shift the key) so one of your friends can do a much shittier rendition of it.
  • Crossfader lets you transition seamlessly from one song to the next.
  • It also has something called “Party Thruster” which involves sliding a “throttle” that allows you to “hear the party build up until you hit maximum party at which time the system booms and the lights go crazy.”
  • That makes such perfect sense, we definitely don’t need to explain it further.
  • Model: OM7560, because “Oh My! There must be 7560 people here!” is what people are going to say about your parties with this thing.
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Bird Is The Word

We have no complaints about this LG Hi-Fi Entertainment & Karaoke System.

Honestly, it seems pretty cool. With 1000 watts, it’s got plenty of power. Plus, it’s got a wide range of features that’ll help you “pump up the party” as the youth say. For example, the Crossfader allows you to blend songs together seamlessly. And the Karaoke Creator can suppress the vocals of a given track and then shift the key to one that better suits the karaoke singer.

It also has something called “Party Thruster” which allows you to “hear the party build up until you hit maximum party at which time the system booms and the lights go crazy.” If you’re unsure of what that means, maybe this, from the instruction manual, will help paint a clear picture:

Sounds like a pretty quick party if you ask me, but I’m told it happens to a lot of guys.

So again, we have no complaints about this particular karaoke system. Our complaint is about karaoke in general, or, to be more specific, about the musical artists we so often choose NOT to sing. That’s right: I’m talking about birds. Despite being nature’s original songwriters, you rarely hear anyone at a karaoke night sing a song by the many great bird-fronted musical groups out there, such as:

  • Oriole Speedwagon,
  • Cardi(nal) B,
  • Chirp Trick,
  • The Coo-Coo Dolls,
  • David Crowie,
  • Squawking Heads,
  • The Beaksie Boys,
  • The Sparrowling Stones,
  • Nine Finch Nails,
  • Pengwen Stefani,
  • Red Hot Chili Pipers,
  • Macawl McCartney,
  • Fowrener,
  • Kendrake Lamar,
  • The Flamingo Lips,
  • Ibis Markie,
  • Kelly Larkson,
  • Kingphisher,
  • or The Killers (of Worms & Field Mice).

It’s ridiculous, really! These are some of the greatest musicians to ever roam the skies, and they get no recognition. But you can change that. All you need to do is buy this LG Hi-Fi Entertainment & Karaoke System. Then, come your next karaoke party, make it a rule: only bird bands. We promise you won’t egret it!

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