The Mehliad

Chapter 10
Continuing the tale of young Dan Fogelberg (no not that one), who fell asleep in a storm and woke in a fantastical, creepy land. Beyond that, your guess is as good as ours.

“Look I didn’t mean any disrespect,” I tried to explain as a hunched, sickly woman led us down a winding stone staircase, “I was just frustrated, y’know?” I looked to Geoff for backup, but he wouldn’t say anything. He looked terrified.

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” the woman croaked with a grim smile. I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

“Dan,” Geoff whimpered, “I’ll show you how to go home. We should leave.”

“Oh now you wanna help?”

“Look we need to-”

“SILENCE” a voice boomed through my skull, nearly flattening me.

“Who the fuck was that?” I squealed.

“The Overlords,” the woman intoned solemnly.

“Where? I don’t see anything.”

“Down there. Below.”

Not to get all Lovecraftian Horror on you, but it’s really hard to describe just what the hell I saw in that pit.

The crazy old woman had led us down into what looked like a sewer, except not a real sewer because those are small and cramped and full of shit. This was a huge, gothic chamber of grimy brick and foul, dripping water.

Like in the movies. In the center was a well about 30 feet across. I peered down into it. It looked like a writhing mass of cocks and slugs, all covered in pearlescent green mucus. They twisted and intertwined and slid around and through each other in constant motion.

“What. The. Fuck.” I know. They should’ve sent a poet.

“WE ARE THE OVERLORDS,” the slug dick thing bellowed into my mind through some sort of telepathy. It must’ve been in Geoff’s mind too, because he flinched like he’d been struck.

“Uh, hi. I’m Dan. Dan Fogelberg.”

“LIKE THE-”

“No, no relation. It’s actually kind of a common name.”

“YOU HAVE DISRUPTED OUR HARMONIOUS GARDEN, DAN FOGELBERG NO RELATION.”

“I’m sorry. I just want to get home. I was taking a nap and next thing I knew this weirdo was groping me in a men’s room.”

“I told him to not say anything if he accepted the user agreement,” Geoff tried to explain.

“Look I just wanted a decent hand pie that would actually fill me up-”

“ENOUGH CHILDISH BICKERING,” the Overlords boomed, “SINCE WE ARRIVED HERE FROM OUR HOME ON CONDE WE HAVE AMASSED POWER THROUGH THE ACQUISITION OF TALENT AND IDEAS. SOON WE WILL CONTROL ALL INFORMATION, ALL ENTERTAINMENT, AND ALL THOUGHT.”

“Okay.”

“WE- OKAY? THAT’S IT?”

“Whatever, man. I don’t give a shit. I’m one guy. I couldn’t stop you if I wanted to.”

“YOU COULD NEVER HOPE TO STOP US- OH. YOU JUST SAID THAT. SORRY, WE HAD PLANNED ON A LOT MORE RESISTANCE.”

“Near as I can tell, you’re like 90% of the way to absorbing everything in Monolito. And I don’t live here, so whatevs. Can I just go home?”

“EXCELLENT. YOU WILL HEAD TO THE DOCKS. A SHIP AWAITS. IT WILL TAKE YOU AWAY FROM NASTERIA, AWAY FROM MONOLITO. PERHAPS YOU WILL FIND SOMEONE ON YOUR TRAVELS WHO CAN HELP YOU RETURN HOME.”

“Wow, thanks. You guys aren’t nearly so terrible as I thought.”

“WE STRIVE TO DELIVER THE BEST EXPERIENCE FOR CITIZENS AND VISITORS OF MONOLITO.”

“Cool. Well I’m gonna go then. Thanks for your help!”

“ONE LAST THING.”

“Please don’t-”

“TAKE GEOFF.”

“Dammit,” Geoff and I both muttered at the same time. To the docks we went.