2-Pack: Philips Sonicare FlexCare Toothbrush
- A 2-pack of very good, yet affordable electric toothbrushes.
- Up to 62,000 strokes per minute, which means that when we eventually use brush strokes as currency, you’ll be rich!
- 5 modes: clean mode, white mode, gum care mode, sensitive mode, and secret laser mode.
- Wait, we weren’t supposed to list one of those modes! OH NO!
- Model: HX6964/77, because they put a HeX on plaque.
Toothfully Speaking, They're A Very Good Option
If you’re looking at today’s sale and saying, “What the hell, Meh! I bought these when you sold them for $149 and now you’re going to turn around not two months later and offer them for LESS THAN HALF THE PRICE,” then chill. These are not those toothbrushes.
On the other hand, if you’re like, “Uh, Meh, are you playing right now? Because last time I bought an electric toothbrush from you it was supposed to be a Christmas gift, only I didn’t get it by Christmas, or very soon after Christmas for that matter, and I was maybe an accomplice to a crime,” then, once again, chill. These are not those toothbrushes either.
So why even bring those up? Because they establish a pretty clear spectrum of toothbrushes. The aforementioned $149 two-pack is the highest of the high end. Like, think about it: even WE had to sell them with a price tag in the triple digits. We who make a game of driving prices as low as we possibly can. We who gather around @moose’s desk as he sets up sales and chant “CHEAPER! CHEAPER! CHEAPER!”
The other ones–the ones that were… uhh… slow to arrive–they’re the lower end. There’s nothing wrong with them, per se. They’re a little pulse-y, a little time-out-your-brushing-session-y, all that good stuff. They just don’t have the juice, you know? They’re really just a great travel option for electric toothbrush owners who don’t want to drag along the bulky model thy use at home but also don’t want to slum it with one of the old analog jobs either.
These ones we’re selling today? They’re right in the middle. They’re not the Maserati, nor are they the Chevy Aveo with the salvage title that makes a rattling noise the salesman assures you is “a sound that all cars make.” They’re the 2015 Honda Civic. Which is to say, they’re nice and they’ll get the job done.
So, if you’re tired of spending a week working out that piece of kale between your molars…
Or you’re maybe starting to suspect that, when your dentist smiles and kindly suggests an upgraded brush, what they actually mean is they’ve devoted several therapy sessions to the horrors they’ve seen inside your mouth…
Or if you’re just electric-toothbrush-curious but don’t want to spend too much…
Then these are the toothbrushes for you!
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2-Pack: Philips Sonicare FlexCare Toothbrush 55
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F*** You: Mad Ape Den Karaoke 14
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Be honest: how often do you floss? 47
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Cinoclav's Field of 32 Day 27 22 -
Speaking of Keanu 10 -
Has anyone ever actually won?? 20 -
Anyone else receive their 2-Pack: Solar Powered Flickering Flame Torch Lights 3 -
Side Deal Ads/ Banners / whatever 5