It's De-pendant On You

Let’s start with a quick breakdown of the sale: we’re selling a very simple build-your-own-2-pack of pendants. We say ‘very simple’ because there are only 2 pendant options to choose from. Both are gold-plated. Both have diamond accents. Only difference is one is sapphire, and the other is ruby. Thus, you can get two sapphire pendants (for $14), two ruby pendants (for $20), or one of each (for $17).

But what is this sale really about? As in, what do you get beyond the promised jewelry? The answer is simple: you get to know yourself a little better.

If your immediate thought was, oh, I’ll do 2 rubies, or hell yeah, 2 sapphires for me, that’s a sign you’re decisive. You’re not afraid that a change of season or mood or what have you is going to alter your stone preference. You’re bold, dammit! You know what you want and you get it. Today it might be some jewelry. Tomorrow it might be a promotion. In a year it might be edging out Chad (that fucking rowing-club-looking, doesn’t-even-know-how-to-operate-a-toaster dipshit Chad!) to make partner at your law firm. It doesn’t really matter. Point is, if you want it, you know it, and you go for it.

Although, setting it up like this isn’t great for business. Because it implies those who get the mixed 2-pack are indecisive, afraid to make decisions, cowering in the face of choice. And that’s not what we want to do.

And, in fact, if you think about it, it’s patently false. Just because someone decides to get a sapphire and a ruby pendant doesn’t mean they’re terrified to make a decision. It means they’re honest with themselves. It’s not that they lack defined tastes; it’s that they’re comfortable enough with themselves to understand their tastes might change for any number of reasons. They don’t subscribe to society’s dictum that one must make up their mind and never sway. They’re the ones who leave the law firm on the eve of their promotion to partner, in order to study floriculture at a Swiss university, without a second thought about Chad or anyone. Because they’re always ready to try something new.

But now we’ve gone too far in the other direction. We’ve alienated those who chose to get a 2-pack of the same stones. We’ve made them seem like cogs in the machine rather than driven go-getters.

Let’s try this instead: clearly, the choice to make a purchase, ANY purchase, is the bravest of all. So buy some pendants. And also all the other stuff we sell. Because it’s not about us. It’s about you. (But also, a little about us.)